The Open Umbrella
Welcome! The Open Umbrella is a queer mental health blog about gender, sexuality, LGBTQ+ issues, therapy, queer relationships, sex-positivity, kink, ethical nonmonogamy, neurodiversity, healing from trauma, intergenerational trauma, and all that related stuff that will come up!
Sex and Sexuality Beyond the Gender Binary through Sex-Positivity
When it comes to sex, everyone deserves to embrace pleasure in a way that honors not only their desires but their identities. Holistically, this concept sounds commonplace; having sex (or having no interest in having sex) must be determined by the person or persons engaging in it. From exploring a new kink to designing a scene to play with a partner to navigating what turns you on, these elements that make sex desirable are intended to be subjective.
Scrupulosity: The Intersection of Religious Trauma and OCD
The rules of religion can feel confusing, and the ways in which people inconsistently engage with it can be really difficult for neurodivergent humans. You might have learned conflicting messages about how it’s not okay to have sex before marriage but then seen others at Church be praised or recognized despite doing so. Maybe you read the Bible word-for-word and took literally the sensory descriptions around hell, maybe you heard the question from pastors “are you sure you know where you are going today?”, and the uncertainty wasn’t something that felt safe to sit with because the stakes were too high, and so you learned to repeat prayers, to read until you felt “just right”, to try to mimic the things that others said you were supposed to feel, like closeness to an abstract being, and maybe you learned to believe that you were the problem, to always blame yourself.
What is the Neurodiversity Umbrella?
You may be hearing the terms “neurodiversity” or “neurodivergent” more recently. Many mistake neurodivergent to be synonymous with someone who is autistic or has ADHD, or both. However, neurodivergent and neurodiversity are concepts from the neurodiversity movement which are much larger than that.
Connecting the Drops
Healing Umbrella therapist Amy Eller LPC-MHSP reflects on how trauma reminders have become the “raindrops” connecting coping strategies, tools, and her own therapy approach.
How do you find an LGBTQ-affirming therapist who is actually affirming?
If you’re queer, you know how hard it is to find a safe and affirming therapist. If you’re wanting therapy because you’re exploring your gender identity or sexual orientation, you probably have run across a lot of therapists who identify as “LGBTQ-affirming,” but then you may have gone to see them and not felt seen or understood. Or worse, you may have been hurt by them.